Author Archive
What Women Want is a Punch in the Face
All this mock outrage over Mel Gibson really pisses me off. Nobody cares about that woman he beat, What’s-Her-Face McTeethmissing. Sure, the whole damn thing is a tragic case of a rich asshole succeeding in spite of what we’d like to believe about success’s prerequisites, but there’s nothing everyday people can do about it other [...]
Brandon Boyd’s new solo album, “The Wild Trapeze”
Brandon Boyd (Incubus’ lead singer, for those of you not in my target audience) just released a solo album. In the official press release, Boyd says the music is inspired by weed. The Wild Trapeze sounded uncomfortable to me at first—the instrumentation has a washed out sound that made me think the gain [...]
Teenagers: Greek Orgs and Religion
I make much of my progress in arbitrary brain wandering by comparing things which have demonstrated a few traits in common, and testing for other commonalities. If two things belong to several of the same categories, it makes sense to begin by assuming that they will share several traits. Sure, this is how stereotypes form, [...]
I’ve figured out how Twilight and Football are the same
Girls supporting Football is like guys supporting Twilight: most of them are just doing it to cull favor with the opposite sex by demonstrating acceptance for their coping mechanisms. Genuine enjoyment of the sport/fiction among the opposite gender of the typical audience is rare.
This is because both are usually vapid and bland for uninitiated [...]
To Know–to Dare: to Blaspheme
If you only see learning as a process by which you, ignorant, empty yourself of the nothing you have fed your mind and devour the truth (absolute and filling), then you have missed the point. Yes, you are ignorant, but you are also brilliant! We all are. We flower from infant buds into impressively multifunctional [...]
I love October.
Click through to see the whole photo.
Now if you’ll excuse me: I have a mosquito to kill.
The room is laptop-lit, and the October air is friendly. If I dangle my chillum from my knuckles in front of the window, I can’t help but adjust my fist to slide the tip in line with one of the twin tangerine dots of light marking the other side of the street. The lights [...]
We Will Part With Paper (and What That Means)
Staples and Office Depot will go out of business. When we lost Circuit City, I saw it as clear as day. These companies are overwhelmingly being supplanted by centralized, catalog-based suppliers for office furniture and local liquidators/resellers. Kinko’s and FedEx/UPS stores will continue on the path of convergence and absorb some duties of these relics [...]
What America’s Getting For Her Money: Corrupt Cops, and a Corrupt Judicial System
Speed camera pranksters in Arizona are dodging their illegal tickets, and Arizona Department of Public Safety Officer Jeff Hawkins is saying “These are what you probably consider as people who don’t really respect the law at all.”
Officer Hawkins and the State of Arizona should bear in mind that while these cameras are ‘legal’ in Maryland [...]
He could surpass Sublime. Dub FX deserves to take the world by storm.
So the first time I see Australian Ben Stanford, aka Dub FX, perform I’m sitting in a darkened basement and StumbleUpon is dragging its internet-hoe in sad memetic trenches along the seafloor of Youtube and he has appeared amidst several extreme America’s Funniest Home Videos rejects. He is nearly stumbled away from, but his talent [...]
